The Wrath of Coulter

The next in our "The Wrath of..." series is this sweet little number.


Of course, criticizing Ms. Coulter is all too easy, but I do need to say this--Jesus must be thinking, "With friends like these, who needs enemies?" However, I would like to subtitle this:

How I stopped worrying and learned to love Ann Coulter

I think everyone all along knew that Ms. Coulter was not even a true insta-pundit, but more the crazy girl that you invite to your talk show because you just never know if she might pull an Emily Rose, twist her head around, and require the services of a Vatican specialist, all at the same time showing some leg. Now, that description is somewhat unfair, but all the same, I realized today, what her true calling is in the entertainment industry. She is a ideology pornstar. In this nice gentleman's blog I learned that the unmarried (and presumably still virginal?) Ms. Coulter used to date both Bob Guccione III and Bill Maher. Then it hit me. Not that I would ever know, but I have heard that in porn movies, a female character might go straight from receiving a delivery of pizza in the buff to enthusiastically engaging in sexual intercourse. Then I realized that when I watched this video that I was watching conservative ideology porn. Of course, instead of delivering a pizza or performing a sex act, Matt Lauer played the naïve parrot of liberalism against Ms. Coulter's crusading Christian defender of virtue, God, and apple pie.

However, Matt Lauer is a smooth customer. Now he can put "testy" in his interview trophy case right next to "glib." I have to say, for agreeing to participate in conservative ideology porn, Matt certainly did not look like he was enjoying himself. Well, maybe Amnesty International can put together a campaign to free Ms. Coulter from forced conservative ideological pornographic bondage. Of course, I have a feeling Ms. Coulter is a consenting adult, but someone should warn her about what happens to washed up sex-workers. Well, hopefully Montel will still be around in ten years to give her a couch to cry on and tell how she was used by the conservative movement.

I think I'll try to take a moment every day to pray for her and everyone else, liberal or conservative, who is trapped in the "my ideology is bigger than yours," way of thinking. Maybe I should start by praying for yours truly.